Cynic in Spain

Real Life on the Costa del Sol

Another 10 bob millionaire

It was a chance remark that I happened to overhear whilst wining away one afternoon, just watching the world go by, as is my wont. “A good body if a little on the young side”, I remember thinking at the time, but I digress.

The comment had been passed by a middle aged gentleman who appeared to be in earnest conversation with a lady of, shall we say, a certain age.

He was, it transpired, informing her of his disgust of a kind of person that you will find a plenty along the coast. You surely know type, they latch onto perfect strangers then proceed to bore them with the story of their life, not forgetting to mention, in passing, their villas, cars, businesses and boats, whilst smoking all of their listeners cigarettes and putting the drinks on a tab.

Our erstwhile millionaire, having thus established his impeccable credentials, will then remember an urgent business engagement and depart. The tab remains, of course, unpaid, until such time as the victim comes to leave, at which point mein host reacts with something along the lines of “’ere, your mate aint paid his bill …”.

What struck me as odd about this particular conversation was that, during his diatribe, he too was regaling his lunchtime companion with tales of his villas, businesses and boats and she was responding in kind.

The food and drink flowed as this all took place over the course of a leisurely couple of hours. Then, during a lull in the conversation, the lady excused herself and headed in the direction of the rest rooms.

After some 10 minutes had passed and she had not returned the gentleman turned to me and lifted a quizzical, inquiring eyebrow, catching his meaning I remarked that I thought that his guest may have left.

His face was a picture which quickly became a Picasso as a waiter approached him with the bill. Getting up to leave I commented to him “Where there are millionaires, you will invariably find millionairesses. Then beat a hasty retreat before he could ask me for the price of a cab.

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